On November 5, 2009 the Portland Press Herald posted an article entitled "Repeal of Marriage law brings relief and sadness" by Susan M. Cover of the Kennebec Journal and Trevor Maxwell of the Portland Press Herald. This article discussed the feelings of those who supported repealing the law which legalized gay marriage in Maine and those who opposed it.
On May 6, 2009 this was a bill that had been passed through the Maine House of Representatives, Congress and approved by the Governor. Maine had at this point been the first state to legalize gay marriage through the legislature.
On September2, 2009 supporters of repealing the law had collected enough petition signatures to place the issue on the ballot for the November 3rd vote.
On the morning of November 4th 2009 the Yes on 1 campaign declared victory by vetoing the legalization of gay marriage in Maine.
Bishop Richard Malone is quoted in a statement as explaining "These past few months have served as a teaching opportunity to explain to parishioners and the wider community about how and why the church views and values marriage as the union of one man and one woman."
Those opposed to the people's veto are quoted as being disappointed and sad.
Governor Baldacci stated "I want to get to the top of the mountain sooner rather than later...we are going to get to the mountaintop, but we have to take it in stride and one step at a time."
Opponents expressed an overall view of equality for all Maine people whereas supporters of the people's veto expressed an overall view of marriage is between one man and one woman with no exceptions.
I was a supporter of the No on 1 campaign; for equal rights of all Maine people. On the morning the results were tallied and the reports stated that the people of Maine had banned together and voted to repeal the law legalizing gay rights in Maine I was overwhelmingly sad.
I had been looking forward to this law passing. My partner and I are planning a wedding in June and we wanted it to be legal.
What people don't necessarily realize is that in passing this law it was just so that we could say that we were married it has deeper effects in our lives.
My partner and I pay and extra tax on my portion of our health insurance that is covered by my partners employer. If we were married we would not pay the tax.
When we decide to have children one of us will have to adopt our own child.
After our wedding I will stand before a judge and ask permission to change my last name. A right that comes easily for those who are allowed to marry.
When we file our taxes we must file as single, which we certainly are not, and one of us will have the ability to claim our children whereas the other will not.
Those who say "you have domestic partnership" do not realize that domestic partnership does not give us equal rights.
I am positive that this will be an issue that will be brought up again and again by Maine people to ensure equal rights are truly for all Maine people. Until then supporters of equality for Maine, will continue to spread knowledge and our voice.
We live during changing times; times of open minds and broken social barriers.
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Thank you for sharing your personal story with us. It really does help to hear about it in the manner in which you told it, rather than just reading the facts of the ballot in the paper. I too was very disappointed and I believe that some day soon that law will pass. I believe it did pass in some areas, (Portland being one of the largest), but tallied all together, it did not pass for the State of Maine. I think that's some encouraging news. I wish all good things for you and your partner and am sorry that you have to go through all those extra steps that are automatically done when heterosexual partners get married.
ReplyDeleteHey followers... I just wanted to make sure you all also noticed the articles posted for this week regarding gays/lesbians in the military.. the links to these can be found under Blog Archives to your right.
ReplyDeleteThanks,
Jarica
I agree that the bill will be revisited in Maine. I think the primary reson the bill did not pass was the yes on 1 advocates who made relatively bold and unresearched accusations throughout the campaign including educational concerns. I don't believe that homosexuality would have been taught in Maine schools if the bill had passed. I never learned about marriage in school (hetero or homosexual). Marriage is often taught by parents and the bill would not have effected cirriculum
ReplyDeleteok so I just lost my post that I wrote so I will try this again.
ReplyDeleteI have had a great deal of conflict and pain between my family and me this past year in regards to gay marriage. I have heard my family members who are still very religous tell me their strong truths and opinions against gay marriage. In their church homosexuals are seen as beings of the devil and heathenistic behavior that is chosen and can be changed and corrected and forgiven if they chose the right way of life. I have shared with them stories of humans who have been denied access to basic rights and opportunities based on their homosexual identitiy and relationships in which they find love, comfort and acceptance just like my heterosexual family members. I was floored and amazed to know that the family that I am a part of and love very much have such different socially and institutionally constructed views and idoelogy, norms and values that are very different than mine. I personally will not engage in marriage because it is not an equal right or acceptance for all in our society.
It seems like every time I hear about the disadvantages gays have with their partners I always learn something new. I previously hadn't thought, for whatever reason, that gay partners can not file their taxes jointly. Not that this one fact overrides any other facts, but it just goes to show me that no matter how many times I have a conversation about this that there is always a new fact... which means in my mind that there are just sooo many disadvantages gay partners experience. Thank you for sharing your story.
ReplyDeleteI also voted no on question one. I am a firm believer that if your woman happens to be a man or your man happens to be a woman who do people think they are to deny these individuals their happiness.
ReplyDeleteSaying that I can also understand the Gay marriage is against certain religions and am not intending the above statement to be offensive. I simply cannot see how two gay individuals being married would affect those in the religious communities in a negative way.
heather I sympathize with your situation I had similar debates with my family on this topic due to their strong religious beliefs. It is difficult to argue religious beliefs when the individuals have strong values and ethics that are correlated with those religious beliefs.
My thought on gay marriage and my argument that I use to defend it is typically something to the effect of, "African Americans can marry, Asian Americans can marry, people with blue eyes can marry, people with disabilities can marry, people who are old, people who are young can all marry... why do we get to limit which characteristics of a person "allow" them to be married... I mean what is next and what does this imply? Should people who have too high and IQ not marry... it's just incredibly crazy to me.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, thank you so much for your personal story. I think it always helps put things in perspective when an issue is talked about on a personal level rather than just talking about the issues effect on someone else.
ReplyDeleteBefore this post I was unaware of what rights a domestic partnership afforded. I'm still a little confused about what becoming a domestic partner actualy mean? But obvioulsy it does not ensure the fullest amount of equality.
I will forever fight for the victory of the GLBTQI community with my voice and vote. I want my children to know the importance of equality. I can not believe after everything this country has fought for that this is still an issue. let it be, equal rights for all.
ReplyDeleteCarolyn, I have to agree with you. The advertising that was done prior to the vote was very confusing to me. From the commercials show on television I did originally think that they were going to teach gay marriage. I was a little against that because I had never been taught about marriage AT ALL in school. It was done at home. My original thought was that if they were going to teach marriage, they should teach ALL kinds of marriage, not just one kind. I took the time to research the subject and found out the truth. I know though that many people did not find out the truth, and they believed those commercials and voted against it based on misinformation. I know this issue will be revisited and I know that it will pass.
ReplyDeleteI greatly appreciate you opening up and sharing your personal story. I was very disappointed when the vote did not get passed in the State of Maine. I have always been a strong believer that marriage is for anyone, even for those of the same sex. Marriage is for two people that love one another, and everyone should have the freedom to do so.
ReplyDeleteAsia
ReplyDeleteI got this information from EqualityME in regards to Domestic Partnership to clarify it for you.
What is meant by the phrase "domestic partner"?
"Domestic partners" means two unmarried adults who are domiciled together under long-term arrangements that evidence a commitment to remain indefinitely responsible for each other's welfare.
When did Maine's domestic partner registry law take effect?
The 121st Maine Legislature passed LD 1579, a domestic partner registry bill, in April 2004. The law went into effect on July 30, 2004. The law extends inheritance rights, next of kin status, victim's compensation and guardian and conservator rights to domestic partners in Maine.
What benefits does Maine's domestic partner laws offer?
There are six major (and one minor) protections that domestic partners in Maine receive through the combination of the registry law and amendments to various state statutes.
1. The right to inherit a deceased partner’s property.
2. Will be considered next of kin when making funeral and burial arrangements.
3. The right to serve as guardian or conservator of partner's property if partner becomes incapacitated.
4. The right to visit one's partner in the hospital.
5. If an employee works for a company that offers domestic partner health insurance policies, then employee may request insurance for his/her partner and children. (Companies in Maine are not required to offer domestic partner insurance policies and many do not).
6. The right to take up to 10 weeks of unpaid leave to care for one's seriously ill or dying partner or children.
7. The right to submit to a town clerk a partner's absentee ballot.
Who can become registered domestic partners?
Domestic partners may become registered domestic partners if:
1. Domestic partners must be mentally competent adults and not impaired or related in a fashion that would prohibit marriage under Title 19-A;
2. Domestic partners have been legally domiciled together in this State for at least 12 months preceding the filing;
3. Domestic partners are neither married nor in a registered domestic partnership with another individual; and
4. Domestic partner is the sole domestic partner of the other and expects to remain so.
How do I register my domestic partnership?
Visit the Maine Domestic Partner Registry. You'll need to fill out the form and have it notarized - see our list of LGBT-friendly notaries, or ask an attorney. Then submit your form and the $35 processing fee to the Maine Office of Vital Records.
Are there any advantages to filing for a domestic partnership rather than a marriage license? I just wonder if domestic partnerships are most common between homosexuals or if there is any motivation for heterosexuals to opt for a partnership rather than marriage (expect for the fact that marriage is a privilege which cannot be enjoyed by everyone…yet).
ReplyDeleteI am a little confused. All of the above mentioned is legal in Maine? Sounds a lot like marriage only without the word marriage. Plus it looks like some things are missing....insurance protection, etc. Is this the state's way of affording LGBT certain rights while not giving them equal rights? Your opinions are greatly appreciated.
ReplyDeleteI too want to thank you for sharing your personal story and for educating me about some of the impacts of not being afforded to right to marry. I too supported No on 1 during the campaign and believe that there should be equal rights for all to marry. That being said, I also have had the experience similar to others of having family members disagree strongly with this position. I choose not to discuss this issue with them anymore because it is clear to me that they are entrenched in their ideas. They don't seem willing to consider other perspectives and are not at all open-minded about the issue. This is sad to me and makes me wonder how one goes about creating change on such a divisive issue. When someone opposes this issue because of religious grounds, it becomes really hard to debate. They don't want to discuss, because they have already decided what they believe. I, on the other hand, want to educate, but I don't want to waste my time and energies when someone is so clearly not willing to listen.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed this post! thank you for sharing all of you personal stories. I will have to admit that I had the view on gay marriage like a lot of other people, I always viewd it as why do you need to get married? If you love someone then just be with them. After reading this you really opened my eyes to a lot of things and really showed how much more complex it really is. I can see how important it would be to you to change your last name, I feel like that really is important in a relationship. You also gave me new information that I would have never known and that was about the healthcare insurance, I think that is crazy that you had to pay extra tax on the insurance just because you were not married, and the reason being you were not married because you were'nt allowed to.
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